It was my birthday last week. Yeay, horray, balloons. Anyways. One heart-wrenching aspect of this particular birthday is that it was the first birthday I have spent away from my family. The first time to wake up and not have a card sitting for me on the table. The first time to go to classes and not get millions of "Happy Birthday's". The first time my two best friends weren't there waiting for me, squirming with excitement to be the first ones to wish me happy birthday. I know, this might sound selfish. But it's the little things that count right? Granted, I did go home the day after and got to spend a great weekend with my family and friends. I even got a tattoo! Ah! Girl gone wild!! (not really though) I don't know. It just seemed...incomplete. Rachel and Emily, I know you will read this and I'm going to say it anyways, so don't be offended. I felt disconnected at home. My two best friends go to school in the same town, while I am three hours away. Yes, we talk almost every day but it's not the same as being with them all the time. They get to hang out together and do special school things together that the three of us used to do. Emphasis on three. And I know nothing about our friendship has changed. We still have each others' backs one hundred percent, and we are still so close. But it's just different. Another this is while I was home, I felt like I had to choose between either hanging out with my family or going out with my friends. I didn't want to have to choose. Whenever I go home it's always a battle of wills, do I stay at home and spend quality time with my family who I miss so much, or do I go out with my friends and have fun with them who I miss almost equally? It didn't really bother me until this past weekend. But I mean, I'm over it. It's not a big deal, it's just something that comes with going to college. We each are going down our separate paths, and it's our mission to still stay close and be best friends. I guess it doesn't help that I'm sick and sitting in my room on a friday night while everyone else is out partying. Oh well. Boo hoo. Pity party over. On another note, I am so excited because I have so many good things planned for this summer and this next year. I got an internship lined up for the summer that will allow me to stay with my grandparents and get to see my cousins more. I decided I want to get an equine minor, and need to start registering for riding classes next semester. I am excited to live with my current roommate Stephanie and my friend Virginia next year. I keep running into this guy from my biology lab and we talked the other day then he accepted my friend request on facebook. I guess I should be counting my blessings that I have so much going for me. Believe me, I do, but sometimes it's hard not to get so bogged down in what's going on around you. Like this girl in my hall is seriously starting to piss me off. But thats another story entirely. I like how I've gotten so off track from what I first started talking about. Oh well, such is life. We make plans and God laughs. That's just the way it is.
Until next time.
Hugs, and lots of cheap Valentines day candy
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